I Killed Estelle Getty!

Okay, so a friend’s young dog died suddenly a couple weeks ago from aggressive cancer. Sweetest dog in the world. Loved this fucking dog. I wrote her this email in an attempt to cheer her up a little, but in doing so, I apparently stumbled into some ‘Twilight Zone’ death switcheroo deal.

July 8, 2008

I had this thought the other night and I’m going to share it with you, risking you not being even in the slightest mood for laughter. But I actually mean this seriously. It’s a kind of a shitty paradox. Here’s a list of people who, the fact that they get to keep living (despite being evil/hella old/or terrible drug addicts) and Wasabi does not, proves the world is a cold, meaningless place:

Bobby Brown
Keith Richards
Abe Vigoda
Charles Manson
Lindsay Lohan
Jesse Helms (okay, that one was rectified a couple days ago)
Chemical Ali
FIdel Castro
Eli Wallach
Amy Winehouse
Zsa Zsa Gabor
Karl Malden
Dick Clark
Mickey Rooney
Andy Rooney
Billy Graham
Estelle Getty
Bathazar Getty
Andy Dick

I’m just saying, Andy Rooney might want to start clearing out his desk.