stephen falk dot com

Month

February 2010

44 posts

“Shut up, Brad. Your song stunk, I hate your suit, and I could hurt you.” —Albert Brooks, Lost In America
Jan 31, 20101 note
Secrets

Often the secrets people tell me are so funny or weird or heartbreaking or sexy that I really want to share them with you all. But I don’t! But man, sometimes it’s hard being a vault.

Jan 31, 2010

January 2010

77 posts

Jan 29, 2010814 notes
Jan 29, 2010109 notes
“One generally doesn’t indulge another person’s emotional processing at this length unless the jabbering is likely to conclude with sex.” —Ariel Levy, in an unbelievable, kind of awesome sentence in her New Yorker takedown of Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love” follow-up, “Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace With Marriage”.
Jan 28, 201011 notes
Jan 28, 20106 notes
Tumblr Storytelling Series: FOUR DAYS!

natashavc:

First thing: Save the date right now, lovelies. FEBRUARY 23RD 9:30pm at the M-Bar in Hollywood. $10 bucks at the bar.

We got a venue and set list of super talented (and some even goodlooking) writers/performers that you probs already follow on tumblr, to regale you with short (6 min), true stories, WITH NO NOTES! The stories will be funny, surprising, rawwwww variations on a theme.

We will announce the theme FOUR DAYS before hand. The idea behind this whole get together is that New York seems to have all the fun with their COMMUNITY OF WRITERS and we have that here too, but like, WE NEVER HANG OUT, YOU GUYS! So Molls, Will and I decided we would try to right this wrong.

In the next week, we will give you the set list and give you a place formally RSVP. But for now, iCalendar that bitch!

LOS ANGELES 4 DAZEEEE!

xo

I think I was drunk when I agreed to participate in this.

Jan 26, 201049 notes
Play
Jan 25, 201013 notes
“I mean, when the interior of one’s rectum can be seen in HD quality video on DVD any time someone desires, you do learn to appreciate other sorts of privacy.” —Porn star Stoya, a surprisingly good writer, on why she’s not revealing more about what she’s been up to lately… or something. I sort of stopped reading after this quote, my delicate sensibilities a bit startled.
Jan 25, 20106 notes
Remember how Whole Foods CEO John Mackey is crazy?

katherinespiers:

He has just announced a new program whereby skinny Whole Foods employees will enjoy bigger discounts at work than their fat colleagues. Nope, not making it up. BMI-based benefits, people. Can we stop shopping there now?

Jan 25, 201051 notes
Hawkes on Lost! → movieline.com

Fuck yeah, my old buddy John Hawkes is on Lost this season! It’s good to see the nice people flourish. (Sorry about the Vikings, John.)

In case you like Hawkes and have 95 minutes to spare, here are the two of us together in a very independent, but awesome, movie called Harold Buttleman, Daredevil Stuntman, a Francis Stokes joint.

Jan 25, 20102 notes
“It’s like the Whiffenpoofs started a ska band.” —From the recent New Yorker profile of Vampire Weekend
Jan 25, 20104 notes
Kettering The Antlers

This song is a total fucking bummer — in case you’re like me and enjoy that sort of thing.

Kettering, The Antlers

Jan 25, 20105 notes
Jan 25, 201010 notes
Sink → stephenfalk.com

I wrote a short story last year when I was bored and my sink was broken and I was reading a little too much Raymond Carver. Totally forgot about it until just now when I listened to “I Can’t Do Nuttin’ For Ya Man” for the tenth time in a row.

Jan 24, 20102 notes
Jan 22, 201022 notes
Jan 22, 201039 notes
#coffee's for closers only
Jan 22, 20106 notes
Disaster Michael Cera

fuckingbookdeal:

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Jan 21, 2010160 notes
Jan 21, 201034 notes
Jan 21, 201030 notes
Jan 21, 2010
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Jan 20, 20101,619 notes
Jan 19, 2010143 notes
Play
Jan 19, 20104 notes
Jason Reitman Is Being A Poor Sport

Some day I look forward to talking about a Writers Guild arbitration I lost this summer to the director (and now screenwriter!) Rob Reiner. It was one of the more futile, frustrating, and disappointing episodes in a blessed career nevertheless marked by many moments of futility, daily frustration, and near-constant low-level disappointment. (Yay, showbiz!)

That being said, I kind of fucking hate how Jason Reitman is allegedly (and at least by appearances is doing nothing to correct this impression) giving Sheldon Turner the cold shoulder for having won arbitration against him and received shared credit for writing the screenplay to Up In The Air.

(Codicils: Turner may be a total douche and I’m sure there is much more to the story than has been reported. Plus, full disclosure, I have a script I adapted for Universal [from a short story] currently in development at Reitman’s company and could, conceivably, go up against him in arbitration some day in the future. But honestly, more than thinking about what might come, I’m reacting out of my open wounds and whiny sour grapes from having a big-time director rewrite me and then successfully take full credit.)

Jason, I like your movie, but for god’s sake, suck it up, man. Sheldon Turner was hired to adapt the book first. (After, reportedly, the uncredited Ted Griffin.) It was not a tiny, unknown book you “found” at the “small, independent book store called BOOK SOUP.” Hell, I even read it back when it came out. But regardless, I understand you probably feel that you rewrote it from scratch and that his draft didn’t influence you at all, and it may be true, but the rules are the rules. Even the bizarre and byzantine arbitration rules state that the arbitrators must presuppose that all parties had access to all previous drafts. To act like a spoiled child, hog the mic at the Broadcast Critics Awards, and generally act like a dick does nothing to divorce yourself from the reputation directors (egomaniacs) and The Privileged Scions Of The Famous (self-explanitory) have. A group of appointed WGA arbitrators read your and Turner’s scripts (and maybe Griffin’s?) and made a ruling that he deserved to share credit with you, just as a group of appointed WGA arbitrators read my and Rob Reiner’s drafts of our project, and decided he deserved sole credit. You and I both disagree with our respective outcomes (though, to be fair, you still get writing credit, whereas I got muscled out), but I wouldn’t be dickish or mean to Rob Reiner. Don’t hate the player, etc.

Or as a commenter in this thread wrote about the dust-up put it:

Dear Jason Reitman, Smile. You are the director of 3 exceptional movies at the age of 32, you are well on your way to the mantle of brilliant directors like Cameron Crowe and James Brooks. Embrace your WGA writing collaborator, look like best friends, relish in the fact you will all be getting Oscar nominations, probably 3 for you alone. While I have no idea how much of that script you wrote, you are the director and face of the film along with Clooney (because you preceded the movie with Thank You for Smoking and Juno no one doubts your skills as a supremely talented auteur.)

If you embrace Sheldon Turner, you will both have the chance to take home Oscars next month and assure decades of 200K a week rewriting jobs. Whincing audibly when he speaks onstage at the GG makes you look like a douchey credit hog, especially considering this movie is adapted from a best-selling novel whose author by all rights should be onstage with you. So smile and pretend to be Mr. Turner’s best friend, win an Oscar, fast-track another awards-worthy flick and rededicate your efforts to sleeping with Natalie Portman.

Sorry you lost best picture to Abahdah. Way to hide how much it bothered you. Kidding.

“Mine!” “No, mine!”

Jan 18, 201035 notes
Jan 18, 201011 notes
Jan 18, 201017 notes
Play
Jan 18, 20103 notes
Jan 18, 201048 notes
“Los Angeles offers the most dramatic instance of the unbridgeable abyss between America’s classes, cultures, races, and individuals, between its Utopian fantasy and its dystopic reality. I always believed that God would destroy L.A. for its sins. Finally I realized that He had already destroyed it, and then left it around as a warning.” —

Photographer Lewis Baltz

Jan 18, 201013 notes
Jan 18, 2010137 notes
Play
Jan 15, 2010274 notes
Jan 15, 201011 notes
Jan 15, 2010
Play
Jan 15, 2010
Jan 15, 20108 notes
Jan 14, 20106 notes
Jan 14, 201018 notes
Jan 14, 20103 notes
“Not that the Antlers are startlingly original— they’re just swinging for the bleachers at a time when it seems fashionable to bunt, or put your forehead on the bat and spin until you get dizzy.” —From Pitchfork’s review of The Antlers’ Hospice. Sums up very well the three modes of creation I often find myself wildly, sometimes randomly vacillating between.
Jan 14, 20103 notes
Jan 13, 201031 notes
Jan 13, 201014 notes
Jan 13, 20109 notes
Jan 12, 20104 notes
Jan 12, 20101 note
Jan 12, 2010
"We all have someone or something we would rather just forget. Things fall apart. Love hurts. Dreams die. But when you summon Death Bear to your door, you can rest assured that help has come." → clubanimalsnyc.blogspot.com

emmyblotnick:

(via airgordon)

Jan 11, 20109 notes
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